Bart Star
The Simpsons, season 9, episode 6. First aired November 9, 1997. 135 moments of about ten seconds each: open one for its frame, what happens and what's said.
← The Cartridge Family The Two Mrs. Nahasapeemapetilons → The whole episode as text
About the episode
When Springfield's children are found to be badly out of shape, their parents sign them up for pee-wee football, and Ned Flanders proves a winning coach. Homer's heckling drives Ned to quit and hand him the job, so Homer cuts players and makes Bart quarterback over Nelson Muntz. Bart plays terribly, his teammates turn on him, and he fakes an injury before quitting outright.
- Written by
- Donick Cary
- Directed by
- Dominic Polcino
- Guest stars
- Mike Judge as Hank Hill
- Joe Namath
- Roy Firestone
- Chalkboard gag
I did not invent Irish dancing.
- Couch gag
- Compressor
- Production code
- 5F03
The synopsis is our own. Credits and guest stars from Wikipedia and the Simpsons wiki.
Every moment
-
Bart Simpson stands at a classroom chalkboard filled with rows of the line "I DID NOT INVENT IRISH DANCING"…
“The Simpsons”
0:00–0:12 -
Homer, Bart, and a small yellow figure in a pink car are at the Simpsons' garage and driveway, where Bart…
0:12–0:23 -
Only a title card on a retro television set with a pink background and a blue screen
0:23–0:30 -
A brown-haired young man in a light blue shirt holding a coffee cup, a Black man in a green-and-orange…
0:30–0:41 -
Homer sits in a chair beside a table at the purple-walled Check Your Cholesterol booth, where a man…
“Well, your cholesterol level is lethally high, Homer,”
0:41–0:51 -
Homer Simpson sits on a chair beside a tray of small bottles, while a balding, dark-haired man in a white lab…
“but I'm more concerned about your gravy level.”
0:51–1:00 -
Homer stands at a fairground booth with balloons and a striped awning, facing Carl, a Black man in a white…
“Well, you're a little confused.”
1:00–1:10 -
Three men wearing headphones sit at a control panel beneath an EXIT sign: an older heavyset man with glasses…
“You can't tell me what to do.”
1:10–1:20 -
Grampa sits at a green-covered table beside a bearded elderly man in a green sweater and a thin, hook-nosed…
“Now make no mistake, when I say first aid,”
1:20–1:27 -
Marge Simpson stands in front of a blue First Aid booth with a red-and-white FIRST AID sign, a red anatomy…
“Now make no mistake, when I say first aid,”
1:27–1:37 -
Marge Simpson stands before a fire safety poster and a 911 chart, first looking uneasy and then clasping…
“I'm talking about treating serious injuries.”
1:37–1:49 -
Marge Simpson stands beside Lisa Simpson, who wears a red dress, a pearl necklace, and a chain on her ankle…
“Mom, Mom, I stepped in a bear trap.”
1:49–2:00 -
Milhouse sits on a stool at the left beside a woman in a white lab coat with brown hair and glasses…
2:00–2:03 -
A heavyset, balding old man in a white shirt and brown pants strains on a red incline sit-up bench…
“Come on, you can't do one sit-up.”
2:03–2:14 -
Milhouse sits on a wooden stool in a pink shirt and red shorts while a woman in a white lab coat with red…
“We can wait.”
2:14–2:26 -
Bart Simpson bends over with his fingertips near his toes on a stage in front of a blue curtain…
“Come on, even my fat mama can touch her toes.”
2:26–2:38 -
Kent Brockman sits at a desk in a TV studio with a Springfield poster behind him, reading from papers…
“Results from yesterday's health fair are in, and the news is not good.”
2:38–2:49 -
Homer sits on the right of a red couch, laughing, while Marge stands at left holding Maggie in her arms…
“Hey, Tubby, want another Pop-Tart, Tubby?”
2:49–2:59 -
Kent Brockman sits behind a desk with a sheet of paper in front of him inside a TV-style frame…
“You're a disgrace to this family. In this reporter's opinion,”
2:59–3:11 -
Homer sits on a red couch beside Lisa and Bart beneath a sailboat painting, holding a pink-wrapped snack…
“There you go, Bart. Pee-wee football will melt away those unsightly pounds and inches.”
3:11–3:24 -
Ned Flanders sits in front of a bookshelf and glances sideways with a slight smile
“Team sports will keep you away from temptations like rock music and girls.”
3:24–3:37 -
Marge Simpson stands at the counter of Polar Gear, a sporting goods shop with a Smart Sox display…
“He's going to need a... you know, protection.”
3:37–3:47 -
Marge Simpson stands at a store counter beside a sign reading "Dressing Rooms," while a brown-haired clerk…
“I was thinking more like protection for...”
3:47–4:01 -
A brown-haired man in a white polo shirt, who resembles none of the named regulars, stands at a counter…
“Aha, see no more. I read you loud and clear.”
4:01–4:04 -
Marge Simpson stands behind a store counter with a cash register while a brown-haired man in a white polo…
“The old shoulder pads.”
4:04–4:12 -
Marge Simpson stands behind the counter of a store near a cash register, facing a brown-haired man in a white…
“C-U-P.”
4:12–4:19 -
A yellow-skinned, unnamed figure in a red football jersey numbered 15, white pants, and a red helmet…
“Okay, Milhouse, let's try out the new cup.”
4:19–4:23 -
Milhouse faces a boy in a red football helmet with a face guard, a red jersey numbered 15 and white pants…
“Okay, Milhouse, let's try out the new cup.”
4:23–4:35 -
Ned Flanders stands on a grassy field beside wooden bleachers and a goalpost, first from a high aerial angle…
“A little higher, Wendell.”
4:35–4:48 -
Ned Flanders appears on a grassy football field with a line of kids in red jerseys, including Nelson…
“Okay, Nelson's our quarterback.”
4:48–4:59 -
Ned Flanders stands on a football field with Bart and a brown-haired woman in red at the left edge
“And Bart, you'll be a tackle.”
4:59–5:09 -
Lisa Simpson stands by a chain-link fence in a red number 1 jersey and orange skirt, holding a helmet…
“That's right. A girl wants to play football.”
5:09–5:21 -
Lisa Simpson and Ned Flanders stand on a grassy field beside a chain-link fence with bushes and trees…
“You do?”
5:21–5:34 -
Ned Flanders stands on a sports field holding a football and pointing with one finger as he talks
“Well, actually, Lisa, these balls are synthetic.”
5:34–5:44 -
On a football field with a scoreboard reading OGDENVILLE WILDCATS, a figure in a pink shirt with a large…
“Who were we? The Wildcats! Who were we gonna beat?”
5:44–5:55 -
Homer sits on a wooden bench beside Marge with her tall blue beehive, while Lisa, Maggie and two unnamed…
“Hey, Flanders, you're the worst coach this team has ever had.”
5:55–6:03 -
Homer Simpson stands in the middle of a row of seats in front of a blue sky and a pale blue backdrop…
“And the season hasn't even started yet.”
6:03–6:11 -
Ned Flanders stands behind a wooden bench coaching a row of kids in red jerseys numbered 0, 15, 8, 6, 11, 14…
“All right, Wildcats, are you ready to give 110%,”
6:11–6:24 -
Ned Flanders stands before a wooden bench where players in red football jerseys numbered 12, 5, 3, 66 and 14…
6:24–6:33 -
A heavyset boy in a red helmet and red number 2 jersey and a small kid in a purple helmet and white jersey…
“Got it!”
6:33–6:45 -
A player in a red number 2 jersey and red helmet runs across a purple fenced field while a striped referee…
“Ooh, he's quite a little dancer.”
6:45–6:58 -
Ned Flanders stands on a football field and fixes his cap with both hands while Homer, Lisa, and Marge…
“Ah, you got lucky, Flanders. And fix that hat!”
6:58–7:09 -
Bart stands on a football field under a blue sky and floodlights, grinning and then running across the grass
“Oops.”
7:09–7:20 -
Bart is tackled on a grassy field by two purple-helmeted opponents in white shirts and purple pants…
“You okay, Bart?”
7:20–7:34 -
Ned Flanders sits on a bench at a football field beside young players in red helmets and jerseys…
“I'm special!”
7:34–7:44 -
Homer, the bald heavyset man in a white shirt, Marge with her tall blue beehive, and baby Maggie…
“Good big deal. I've been carried out of Moe's like that hundreds of times.”
7:44–7:55 -
A man with dark swept-back hair, a blue suit, a white turtleneck and headphones sits at a desk in a booth…
“Sir, if I could just break in for a moment.”
7:55–8:01 -
Homer sits on a red couch in a pink living room, holding a teal telephone receiver to his ear…
“Yes, Mr. Koufax, don't you think Flanders is a big jerk?”
8:01–8:09 -
Homer Simpson stands in his pink living room holding a teal telephone to his ear beside a purple lamp…
“Yeah, Homer again. I think we got cut off.”
8:09–8:16 -
Players in blue helmets and white jerseys face red-helmeted Victory City opponents on a green football field…
“Five F03!”
8:16–8:25 -
Ned Flanders stands in the foreground of a bleacher crowd, first glaring out with a fierce expression…
“Flanders!”
8:25–8:37 -
Ned Flanders stands on a sports field with a whistle around his neck, first scowling and then grimacing as he…
“What? What is it? Games out there!”
8:37–8:50 -
Lisa and Homer sit side by side on a bench in front of a blue wall, with a grey-haired man in glasses…
“Dad, that was really mean.”
8:50–9:03 -
Ned Flanders leans in toward Homer, who wears a white shirt and has a bald head with stubble
“Do you have a problem with the way I'm coaching?”
9:03–9:14 -
Ned Flanders leans in and scolds Homer, who wears a white shirt and red cap and holds a brown clipboard…
“Uh-huh. Half a brain, huh?”
9:14–9:27 -
A little girl with spiky yellow hair in teal pajamas tumbles through a stack of black tires…
“You're not gonna make the team with that kind of attitude.”
9:27–9:38 -
Homer stands in a pink hallway by a display cabinet, while Marge in a tall blue beehive and pink dress stands…
“Are you wearing my self-defense whistle?”
9:38–9:48 -
Bart stands on a staircase with purple steps and pink walls, and Homer confronts him
“Wipe that smile off your face. What did I do?”
9:48–9:59 -
Marge and Homer stand in the living room by a turntable and talk while looking out a window at the backyard
“You shouldn't pressure Bart like that.”
9:59–10:07 -
Bart runs along a grassy path beside a wooden fence, then slows to a dejected walk and slumps toward a red…
“I knew it. Slowing down already, huh?”
10:07–10:19 -
Homer stands in a pink room with a framed sailboat painting and an arched doorway, glancing to the side
“Don't you remember how bad your father made you feel when you played sports?”
10:19–10:29 -
In a gymnasium with a blue mat, parallel bars, a balance beam and bleachers full of spectators, a boy…
“Wish me luck, Dad.”
10:29–10:40 -
A yellow-skinned, young one-off gymnast with a shaggy brown hairdo, white tank top, white leggings and red…
“Wow, he's dyno-mite! Hmm, what's his name again?”
10:40–10:50 -
Ned Flanders sits on the gym bleachers, while a long-haired brown-haired student in an orange "Bull Shirt"…
“Wow, he's dyno-mite! Hmm, what's his name again?”
10:50–11:01 -
A heavyset, brown-haired man in a green shirt, dark green tie, red trousers and suspenders, a one-off coach…
“You're gonna blow it!”
11:01–11:13 -
Homer first stands in a pink room looking worried, then turns to a purple-framed window to watch Bart walk…
“My father never believed in me.”
11:13–11:25 -
Bart and Homer are outside the pink house with a green garden hose and a white-and-blue lawn chair
“Quit running, son. I just wanna give you a big hug.”
11:25–11:36 -
Homer Simpson runs across a backyard with Bart in an orange shirt, past a tree, a swing set, a dug patch…
“Will you hug me?”
11:36–11:50 -
Homer Simpson stands on wooden bleachers under a blue sky and addresses a line of red-helmeted football…
“Now, while I wasn't able to cut everyone I wanted to, I have cut a lot of you.”
11:50–12:00 -
Homer stands behind a row of players in red helmets and jerseys on a football field, holding a clipboard…
“That's why it was so hard to cut you.”
12:00–12:10 -
Bart Simpson in a red number 15 jersey stands beside wooden bleachers, looking dejected, while an unnamed boy…
“Bart didn't get cut. What a surprise!”
12:10–12:21 -
Homer Simpson stands on wooden bleacher steps holding a clipboard and gripping the shoulder of Bart Simpson…
“which he'll be doing as our new starting quarterback!”
12:21–12:30 -
Homer is hugging Bart, who wears a red jersey numbered 15, on a set of wooden stairs with green hedges…
“But, Coach... What is it, sweetie?”
12:30–12:41 -
Homer Simpson stands with arms spread at the front of a line of small red-helmeted team players…
“Okay now, everyone.”
12:41–12:51 -
Homer drives a purple car while Bart in an orange shirt sits beside him and Lisa reads a green book…
“But I can't play quarterback. I don't even know how.”
12:51–13:04 -
Homer stands on the sideline in front of the wooden bleachers while Ned Flanders lurks behind him and a blond…
“Good luck, Homer.”
13:04–13:14 -
Bart and Homer are on a football field while a team of black-jerseyed players, a striped referee and bleacher…
“Ready, set, hut, hut!”
13:14–13:28 -
Bart Simpson runs with a football down a sideline while Milhouse and other Springfield players in red helmets…
“No, please, Mark, don't!”
13:28–13:39 -
Bart is smeared with mud and holding a football on a grassy field while several girls with black hair chase…
“Excellent, boy, son.”
13:39–13:49 -
Bart Simpson stands on a grassy football field holding a brown football, and at first he looks ready to throw
“Mark, over here, come on!”
13:49–14:00 -
Bart Simpson lies face-down in a muddy puddle on a football field while a referee in black-and-white stripes…
“Oh, crap.”
14:00–14:10 -
Homer first stands beside Bart, who is covered in mud and wears a red number 5 jersey with a shoulder pad…
“Are you kidding? I reeked. Oh, really?”
14:10–14:21 -
Bart grins and holds a football among a group of players in red jerseys on a sunny field with green turf…
“Give me a B. I won't give you a B, but I'll tear you a new A.”
14:21–14:26 -
Milhouse stands beside Bart, whose spiky hair and mud-smeared football pads match his description, as Bart…
“If I wasn't your friend, I'd tell you, you sucked.”
14:26–14:39 -
Bart is confronted on a grassy field by a tall, brown-haired player in a red number 2 jersey who grips…
“You cost us one more game and you're dead.”
14:39–14:47 -
Bart stands in the backyard at night, first looking down and then picking up a football from the snow
“Oh, it's gonna take a miracle for me to become a good quarterback.”
14:47–14:58 -
Bart Simpson stands in a snowy yard at night holding a football and looking anxious beside a tree…
“Oh, it's gonna take a miracle for me to become a good quarterback.”
14:58–15:10 -
Bart stands holding a football on a blue lawn beside a red tub with another football inside, gesturing…
“I cannot believe you are here.”
15:10–15:18 -
An older, heavyset man with swept-back dark grey hair and a white polo shirt stands outdoors at night…
“There's only one thing you need to know to be a great quarterback.”
15:18–15:24 -
Bart Simpson stands in a snowy backyard at night with a brown football while a dark-haired man in a light…
“Oops, hey, look, I gotta run.”
15:24–15:36 -
Bart stands in a backyard at night holding a football beside a wooden fence and a tree, with a purple sky…
“Remember what I told you?”
15:36–15:49 -
Bart stands in a snowy backyard at night holding a football against his chest, looking worried beside a red…
“I'm dead.”
15:49–16:03 -
Bart Simpson lies in bed beside a red alarm clock, then appears on a football field with his head and leg…
“Good.”
16:03–16:14 -
Bart grimaces, shuts his eyes, then opens his mouth and looks around as he speaks
“No.”
16:14–16:26 -
Homer Simpson coaches a football team of kids in red helmets and red jerseys on a grassy field
“Nelson, how's your arm feeling? Great!”
16:26–16:39 -
Bart Simpson stands on a football field between two players in red helmets and jerseys, number 10 on the left…
“He's the heart of this team. No, I'm not, I suck.”
16:39–16:43 -
Homer stands on a grassy field with a bleacher behind him, while Bart leans on a crutch in an orange shirt…
“It's true, he does. Yeah, he does.”
16:43–16:53 -
Bart stands in the foreground on a football field while Homer angrily points and shouts at the young players…
“I quit!”
16:53–17:05 -
Homer, Marge, Bart, Lisa and Maggie sit at the dining table in the Simpsons' kitchen at dusk, the house…
17:05–17:12 -
Homer, Marge, Bart, Lisa and baby Maggie eat dinner together at the family dining table in the Simpsons'…
“So like I said, I've never had a tick burrow in so deep.”
17:12–17:23 -
Marge Simpson sits at the table eating from a spoon in the first six frames, grimacing, chewing, and gazing…
“Well, at least I'm making conversation.”
17:23–17:27 -
Homer and Marge sit at a blue kitchen table with plates of food and glasses of water, while Bart is seen…
“Oh, so now you're quitting dinner, too. Homer, please.”
17:27–17:40 -
Marge Simpson stands in a room with a lamp, wine glasses on a shelf and a red object nearby…
“He's doing what he thinks is best.”
17:40–17:42 -
Homer Simpson sits at a blue kitchen table in front of a plate of corn and peas with a glass of milk…
“Well, if quitting is the best, maybe I should just quit my job.”
17:42–17:51 -
Homer Simpson stands at left holding a red telephone to his ear while the frail, stooped Mr. Burns sits…
“Mr. Burns, this is Homer J. Simpson, the father of the big quitter.”
17:51–17:59 -
Homer and Mr. Burns are shown in split-screen views, each on a telephone at a desk
“Well, I just wanted to tell you I'm a big quitter, too.”
17:59–18:08 -
Milhouse-free football scene on a sunny outdoor field, with a grandstand of spectators behind
“Yo, 25, hut!”
18:08–18:19 -
On a football field with a yellow goalpost and bleachers behind, a yellow-skinned player in a red jersey…
“I've got to quit smoking.”
18:19–18:32 -
Homer and a brown-haired boy in a red number 2 football jersey stand on a grassy field beside wooden bleachers
“We're in the championship.”
18:32–18:42 -
A heavyset man in a blue-and-white cap and white shirt sits on a red flame-decorated motorcycle with a boy…
“Great game, son. Come on. I'm taking you to Hooters.”
18:42–18:49 -
Homer and Chief Wiggum stand together by a wooden-slatted wall before Homer walks to a bench and sits down…
“Well, Bart, looks like it's just you and...”
18:49–18:59 -
Bart peers through a window beside a green wall marked with the words CAT FIGHT and red scratch marks…
“I'll scratch you. The hair! The hair! Slut!”
18:59–19:08 -
Homer Simpson enters the Kwik-E-Mart through its glass doors, then stands at the counter across from Apu…
“I'm feeling kind of low, Appu.”
19:08–19:21 -
Homer and Apu stand at the Kwik-E-Mart counter, with Apu in a green sweater and Homer in a white shirt…
“Oh, well then just give me a six pack and a couple of bags of Skittles.”
19:21–19:31 -
Bart stands at a green arcade cabinet labeled CAT FIGHT, gripping its joystick and pressing buttons…
19:31–19:32 -
Bart stands at the left edge beside a green arcade-style cabinet with red scratch marks and black lettering…
“Hello, son.”
19:32–19:43 -
Bart stands at a bright green arcade cabinet with red scribbles, gripping a joystick-like control and staring…
“If you forgive me, I promise I'll never encourage you again.”
19:43–19:53 -
Bart stands at a green CAT FIGHT arcade cabinet whose screen reads GAME OVER, while Homer watches…
“This thing only takes dollars.”
19:53–20:06 -
Bart stands wide-eyed and nervous at an arcade machine while large hands grip his shoulders, and Homer leans…
“But I thought Uter took my place. Consider him cut.”
20:06–20:16 -
A referee in a black-and-white striped shirt stands near wooden bleachers as a pile of football players…
“Wow.”
20:16–20:19 -
Marge Simpson sits beside a heavy man in a red cap and pink shirt in a wooden bleacher, with a bald man…
“Homer coaching in the championship game.”
20:19–20:30 -
Homer Simpson huddles with a team of red-jerseyed kids in helmets on a grass field, with two onlookers seated…
“Time for one last play, Coach. Hold on, I'm working it out.”
20:30–20:38 -
Homer Simpson leans over a huddle of red-uniformed football players on a grassy field by a chain-link fence
“Okay, half of you vibrate that way.”
20:38–20:46 -
Chief Wiggum leans out of a white police car and shouts through a red-and-white megaphone
“All right, I've got an arrest warrant here for Nelson Muntz.”
20:46–20:59 -
Homer stands beside Bart, who wears a red football jersey, at a football field, and Homer talks to him…
“Are you sure, son?”
20:59–21:12 -
Homer coaches a huddle of red-jerseyed football players behind a wooden wall, then the team breaks and runs…
21:12–21:22 -
Bart sits in the back seat of a car while Chief Wiggum drives
“So what's the charge, Chief?”
21:22–21:32 -
A slim man with swept-back dark hair and a light blue polo shirt with a chest pocket and tan trousers stands…
“Poor Bart.”
21:32–21:44 -
A thin, one-off man with swept-back dark hair, a light blue polo shirt and tan trousers with a brown belt…
“It's the third most common cause of car stallings.”
21:44–21:56 -
No regular Simpsons characters appear in this moment, which is a black title-card sequence of opening credits
“Scully, you're cut.”
21:56–22:05 -
No Simpsons characters appear; the moment is a black screen of end credits in gold lettering, with each name…
“Cartwright, cut. Smith, sorry, cut. Nazaria and Shira, you're cut.”
22:05–22:14 -
No Simpsons characters appear in this moment; it is a black screen with centered gold credit text…
“Bill Shultzen, Wolf and Silverman.”
22:14–22:23 -
No Simpsons characters appear in this moment; it is a sequence of black end-credit cards with gold lettering…
“Piantola, Bridge, and Kawahawa.”
22:23–22:32 -
No Simpsons characters appear in this moment; it is a black closing credits sequence with gold text…
“Look at how many cuts there are there.”
22:32–22:41 -
A silhouetted audience of seated figures sits in rows of theater seats in a dim, bluish cinema, with a large…
“You're cut too shushy”
22:41–22:52
Who's in it
Bart Simpson, Homer Simpson, Lisa Simpson, Marge Simpson, Maggie Simpson, Milhouse Van Houten, Grampa Simpson, Ned Flanders, Barney Gumble, Chief Wiggum, Krusty the Clown, Lenny Leonard, Apu Nahasapeemapetilon, Dr. Hibbert, Mr. Burns, Waylon Smithers, Nelson Muntz, Kent Brockman, Otto Mann, Jasper Beardsley, Martin Prince, Ralph Wiggum, Groundskeeper Willie, Lewis Clark, Wendell Borton, Richard, Todd Flanders, Maude Flanders, Rod Flanders, Sideshow Mel, Kirk Van Houten, Nina Skalka, Janey Powell, Luann Van Houten, Helen Lovejoy, Adrian Belew, Ruth Powers, Jaffee Ziswhisky, Gareth Prince, Sarah Wiggum, Gloria Prince, Sanjay Nahasapeemapetilon, Cletus Spuckler, Old Jewish Man, Alice Glick, Bumblebee Man, Rainier Wolfcastle, Brandine Spuckler, Allison Taylor, Sherri and Terri, Üter Zörker, Jerri Mackleberry, Eddie Muntz, Hank Hill, Joe Namath, Professor Taylor, Bill Dauterive, Bobby Hill, Dale Gribble, Jeff Boomhauer, Luanne Platter, Peggy Hill, Referee, Roy Firestone, Rudy, Sandy Koufax, Sportacus clerk
Everyone who appears in it, from the Simpsons wiki. Every character